During World War II, the Japanese briefly occupied Kiska Island, a remote territory of the United States. Allied forces prepared for a fierce battle as they advanced toward the island. Both Canadian and U.S. troops landed, expecting to engage the enemy, unaware that the Japanese had abandoned the island two weeks earlier.
But what followed was not the battle they anticipated. Instead of fighting the Japanese, confusion and tension led to friendly fire incidents between the Allies themselves. The Japanese had left behind booby traps and land mines, which added to the confusion. The occupation of Kiska Island resulted in 92 Allied soldiers losing their lives—not to an enemy force, but to one another.
Engaging with nonbelievers about contentious topics or hot-button issues reminds me of the story of Kiska Island. Like those soldiers, we can enter these discussions on edge, fearing a fight or misstep, and end up damaging relationships while trying to communicate truth.
It’s a minefield. You know what I mean. We’ve all been there—nervously navigating a conversation about a hot-button social or political issue, only to find that a word we didn’t mean to trigger something has exploded in our face like a booby trap. Suddenly, we've made a casualty instead of a convert, and when the dust settles, we realize we’ve wounded someone we care about.
So how do we communicate truth without causing unnecessary “casualties”? How do we stay faithful to God’s Word while keeping relationships intact, especially with those who don’t share our beliefs?
We can take three important steps to do this well without compromising truth or our witness.
Stand Strong without Sacrificing Conviction
First and foremost, we cannot afford to sacrifice our Christian convictions. When we find ourselves in these conversations, the temptation may be to soften or downplay the truth to avoid conflict. But as believers, we stand on the Word of God. We must let God’s voice be the final authority on questions of morality, ethics, and behavior, and this includes our positions on sensitive social and political issues.
We can’t navigate these difficult issues by bending to the latest cultural trends in the name of tolerance, compassion, or relevance. The truth is timeless. As followers of Christ, we must remember that God is anti-sin, and that’s not negotiable even when it is unpopular.
Author Erwin Lutzer talks about how many young believers today, especially millennials, are tempted to replace the Gospel message of personal repentance with a more socially acceptable focus on justice and helping the needy. While those are noble causes, Lutzer rightly warns that we can’t preach justice without talking about judgment. We must maintain the conviction that God’s standards are eternal and that there will be a time of reckoning for everyone.
But standing strong doesn’t mean we should be judgmental. The heart of Jesus’ message is to love sinners and rejoice when they repent. There’s no room for self-righteousness. Yes, we hold the truth, but we must also hold compassion. Remember, righteousness without humility isn’t righteousness—it’s pride.
Courage without Condemnation
Another key to navigating these difficult conversations is courage. We must be brave enough to speak the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. As Christians, we know that sin has consequences—eternal consequences—and that knowledge compels us to warn others. It’s not out of judgment but out of love that we tell people about the consequences of sin.
Many people do not recognize the connection between sinful hearts and complicated moral issues. Opinions about hot-button issues may indicate that those who hold them are walking down paths that lead to destruction. In these cases, we cannot be silent, but sharing the truth takes courage. And yes, it often comes with the risk of rejection. But our love for others must drive us to speak out, trusting God to use our words for good.
At the same time, we can’t afford to let our courage become condemnation. People must see Christ’s love in us as we share His truth. Someone once said, “A Christianity without courage is cultural atheism.” But I’d add that a Christianity without compassion is not Christ-like at all.
We don’t speak truth to win an argument. We speak truth to win hearts. And that requires grace and gentleness just as much as it requires boldness.
Salt and Light without Seeking Victory
Matthew 5:13–16 (NLT):
“You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it salty again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless."
“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father."
Jesus called us to be the salt of the earth and the light of the world. But why? So that others might see our good deeds and give glory to God, not us.
As we engage with non-believers on sensitive topics, we must remember the purpose behind our words and actions. We’re not trying to prove we’re right, and we’re not even necessarily trying to bring someone to conversion at that moment. Our ultimate goal is to glorify God.
When we let our light shine before others, the goal is for them to see Christ, not us. So before we speak, we need to ask ourselves: Are my words reflecting God the way He wants to be represented? Does my approach bring honor to His name? If the focus is on my pride or desire to win, I’ve missed the point entirely.
Love and Listen without Losing Truth
Here’s the heart of the matter: we must love the people we engage with just as much as we love the truth we’re defending. Jesus did this perfectly, didn’t He? He loved those who rejected Him, and so must we.
When you’re in a conversation about sensitive issues, take a step back and ask yourself: “What’s my long-term goal for this relationship?” As Christians, we should aim to love the other person, even if they don’t believe what we do. Even if they never accept Christ. Loving someone doesn’t mean compromising your convictions—it means demonstrating the grace of God through your words and actions.
The Principle of Power in Prayer
Finally, we can’t underestimate the power of prayer in these situations. We can argue, explain, and reason—but only God can change hearts. It’s the Holy Spirit who convicts people of sin, of righteousness, and of coming judgment (John 16:8).
That's why every conversation we have must be carried along by prayer. If we know we’re going to have a challenging conversation with a lost friend or family member, we should start by praying for them. Ask God to prepare their heart. Ask God to guide your words. And then, after the conversation, keep praying. Pray that God will continue to work in their life.
The Apostle Paul put it this way in Colossians: “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message… Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone” (Colossians 4:2-6).
Prayer opens doors for us to speak, and it enables us to speak graciously when those doors open.
Courageous Conversations with Christ at the Center
Conversations about faith, politics, or morality can feel like walking through a minefield. But we don’t have to create casualties. By standing strong in our convictions, speaking with courage, showing love, and relying on prayer, we can engage the world around us in a way that honors God and protects our relationships. So speak the truth in love, guided by the Spirit, and trust that God will use our words to point others to Him.
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